If I get zits when I'm older then that means Heavenly Father is back-sassing me.

--Ashton

I can't believe I live here

Topeka has made an idiot move. One of those moves that leaves your jaw on the floor, and you picturing Jeff Foxworthy in your head saying "There's your sign". 

Today I was randomly looking at a page in the paper and found the most hysterical article about Topeka's latest 'whoops moment'. This quiz (which I copied out of the paper), designed to test your knowledge of current events by Ric Anderson (of the Topeka Capital Journal), was fantastic. 

QUESTION 1: Which of the following cost the city of Topeka $86,000?

a. Digging a hole and filling it.

b. Removing a strip of concrete from the middle of SW Wanamaker Road for a median project, then discontinuing the project and replacing the strip after retailers along the corridor complained the median would reduce access to their business.

c. There's a difference?

(correct answer: Technically, B)

Question 2: True or false

Question #1 begs for a cheap shot about how the city recently hired a "performance coordinator" for $78,000 to search for ways to make the city government more efficient and effective. 

(correct answer: True. And there you have it.)

Question 3: Which of the following could have been purchased with the amount of money it will cost the city to undo the median work?

a. A three-bedroom, 1370 square foot home in Topeka

b. A 2009Mercedes-Benz E-class sedan

c. An automotive tune-up, repair and maintenance shop in Lenexa.

d. All of the above. 

(correct answer: D, according to various internet sources.)

Question 4: A 63-year-old Hutchinson man was charged monday in connection with drunken driving. What was unusual about the case?

a. The man was arrested while riding a moped. 

b. It was the 11th time the man had been charged with a DUI.

c. The man was on parole from a previous DUI conviction that occured after he ran into a set of fuel pumps last December and set them on fire. 

d. All of the above.

(correct answer: D)

Did she just say that?

For family home evening this last monday, we had a family discussion in order to help my nephew earn a merit badge. We each were assigned by him to talk about a diffrent topic. My 14 year old neice was chosen to talk about what to do in case of a fire or tornado.

This is her plan for a fire:

Step 1: Kick out the closest window. 
Step 2: Throw random crap out the window so the neighbors know you are in distress.
Step 3: Find your cell phone.
Step 4: Hurl yourself out of the window you have previously kicked out. (i will also add that most everyone in the house will have to jump from a second story window.)
Step 5: Run (with our broken limbs since we have just jumped from 30 feet) down the street.

Anyone see any flaws? 
(Love ya Lyndsey)

Today is the day!!!

After a couple weeks of waiting and numerous attemps to tighten a piece of floss around Ashton's slippery tooth it is finally out! He was very brave....well not so much after one kid at school told him she bled all over when she had her tooth forced out with a door, and everyone saying how much it hurt. He didn't want me to pull it out. I gave it one tug and Ashton was immediately pulling the string against me. Then...all the sudden....there was a pop and the string resurfaced. I had a moment thinking..'wow. the string broke...but it doesnt look broken...did I pull that hard?' Good thing Ashton felt the tooth on his tongue. He said it didn't hurt at all and was asking me at 7:45 if it was time to go to bed because he was so excited about the tooth fairy. He won't know until tomorrow but the tooth fairy made a stop at target and decided a new pokemon ds game would be perfect for the first tooth. 

I am pretty peeved because I took a video at every attempt of getting this tooth out. At LEAST 10 videos. Ask me if I have one for when the tooth actually came out...go ahead...I dare you. 

send him back!

Talan learned how to take off his diaper, poop in his bed and then take a nap in it. All this with the lights off! 

Yay me!!

tick toc

Time is running short for Ashton's tooth. We've tried numerous times to evict the pearly white from his mouth. Unsuccessful thus far.  Today, as I was checking the status of Ashton's tooth, I noticed I could fold it forward enough to actually see his gums under his tooth. Also, there is a white tip poking through. 

I gave Ashton until monday night to get the tooth out himself. I told him to wiggle it, twist it, pull it...etc. If it is still in his mouth monday night then we will force that stubborn tooth out using a string and a door. 

Wish him luck! 

Flippin, Arkansas

This just might be my favorite picture ever!

Really?

I got a call from the allergist office. They had the results of Talan's blood test. Here's the shocker....

Talan is SEVERELY ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS...

No-freakin-duh morons. I don't know if he is allergic to anything else because they didn't test for anything else. I was led to believe they were testing for everything, but instead they only tested for the one thing that I already knew was positive. I want to punch him in the face. They made me hold my child down while they stuck a needle in his arm to tell me something I already knew??? 

Where have all the competant doctors gone?

I never thought I'd see the day

Me: "Ashton when you are 12 like Justin are you going to like girls?"

Ashton:"I don't know. Probably"

Me: "do you think Justin likes girls"

Ashton: "yep"

Me: "Do you like girls now?"

Ashton: "Maybe" (this is a big fat yes from Ashton. He thinks he's fooling me.)

Me: "Do you like anyone in your class?"

Ashton: "NO...EWWW"

Me: "Do you like any girls in primary?"

Ashton: "Maybe"

Me: "Do you like Ellina?" (She and Ashton go way back. They used to go to nursery together and play out in the hall)

Ashton: "MAYBE"

he likes a girl!!! SHHH! If you see him don't mention any of this. Otherwise he won't tell me any of this stuff anymore.

Greasy-faced idiots

Since Talan's peanut allergy everywhere we go we have to ask if they cook with peanuts or peanut oil. If the answer is yes, even if his food doesnt have peanuts in it, then Talan cannot eat there. So tonight we had KFC. Talan loves KFC biscuits but just to be on the safe side my brother in law asked about the peanut oil. KFC's response?

"We fry our chicken so we don't use oil"

Tell me this....how does one fry something without oil? 

The year is upon us

I will confess. I'm 25 and currently not registered to vote. Mainly because I don't believe my one vote is really going to change the course of the world. That and the fact that I don't ever watch presidential debates or know who is campaigning for what so why make an uninformed decision and screw up the votes of people who spend countless hours following this crap. The president is just going to do whatever anyway, right?

All this was true until about a week ago. I was flipping through the channels and happened to stop on one of the thousands of channels that was replaying Sarah Palin's speech in Minnesota. I had no idea who she was. When I heard McCain picked the gov. of Alaska as his running mate I couldnt really care less. I'm not voting anyway. 

While the speech was on I was struggling to change Talan's diaper because he aparently had a difference of opinion on his diaper status. I figured I'd change the channel after I had overtaken the 1 year old and his diaper. I soon found myself in a situation I've never been in before. I was glued to the TV. I love everything about her. I love the way she talks, I love that she has a sense of humor, I love that her family is normal. I feel like she is not just talking a bunch of BS. Good job McCain. 

The selling point for me during the speech was when the camera cut away to her young daughter who was holding the baby. In the few seconds the camera was focused on her the girl managed to lick her entire hand and smooth down baby palin's hair. That was the first moment of my life that I've ever had the desire to vote. 

So. Now to register.   

Slacker

I'm officially lame. I've been slacking majorly in the blogging world and now I am way behind. Here are a few updates:

---Talan loves to play peek-a-boo. He thinks he is hilarious. Don't we all. 

---This is what happens when I'm asked why Talan doesn't have a Mohawk. The answer...where is the gel?!

---Finally a walking a video. This was taken a while ago after he first started walking. He's much more stable now. Well somewhat. 

---We love sonic drinks!!!

---Happy First Birthday Talan!!! (Aug 21) Just after this picture was snapped he turned and started walking towards the street. It is much easier to go down hill than up. 

We celebrated his birthday with family and a few friends here in Topeka. I bought a water slide (which will bring us tons of summer fun), and we had snow cones, watermelon and ice cream cake. Talan had a curious george cupcake from Daddy Cakes. It was banana. 

Cousin Justin was in charge of the snow cone machine. 

---Ashton has his first loose tooth!!! Actually, he has been saying it was loose for a while now, but it seemed more to me that he was just moving his head instead of actually feeling the tooth move. We were miniature golfing with Brad over the weekend and Ashton discovered that his tooth really is loose. After my confirmation of his loose tooth he named that day "the best day of his life."

---Today Talan had his blood drawn for his allergy testing. It was horrible as expected. The nurse had to fish around just a bit for his vein, but at least he only had to get stuck once. We get the results in about 10 days and that will be followed by the skin test for peanuts. Talan started getting a bruise while the nurse was taking the blood out so I havn't been brave enough to take the bandages off yet. 

Welcome back Dad!!!

We were lucky enough to spend the holiday weekend with Brad. The boys were so excited to see him. Neither of them wanted him out of their sight all weekend.