Whine, whine...cry, cry...would you like an apple pie?

First, I'd like to say how much I love being a military wife. Not only does Brad look ever so great in that uniform, but I'm so proud of the hand that he has in keeping this country safe.  I can't really imagine what it would be like to have a husband who works 9-5, and is home every night for dinner. It is not an easy life, and it isn't for everyone, but even with the bad I've grown to love it and even when we are facing trials, and seperations our relationship with one another only gets stronger, and I learn something new about myself in those times.

Unless you are in our shoes, you can't begin to understand what it feels like, or all the sacrifices are involved, not only for the soldier, who sometimes have to live in less than desirable and dangerous conditions half way around the world from their loved ones, but also for the family left behind in those times. The spouse who is left to pick up the extra work loads around the house, and put on a brave face for everyone while in constant worry of her soldiers safety. The kids who spend 18 months of growing missing their dad. Then there is the excitement of getting a phone call even if it is only once a week, or seeing your husband (or wife in some cases) for the first time in a year and a half walk of a plane or bus unharmed. There is a new appreciation for the small things that most people take for granted.

Brad has been deployed overseas twice now in addition to the last year stint of him being half way across the country for all but 4 days a month. I didn't complain when I was a scared 19 year old left behind with a 10 month old baby and no clue as to what a deployment would be like, or when Brad was only able to call me once a month for about 15 minutes at a time for the first few months because the phone was a drive away. I didn't complain when he was deployed within weeks of my dad passing away, and instead of being able to go home and pick up the pieces from that heartbreak I had to set that aside and pack up our house and set into military mode. I didn't complain when we had to be apart again, only seeing my husband 4 days a month. How could I complain about that when some families can't have their soldiers home at all?

With all that said, I feel like it is my turn to complain....just this once, as Brad's deployment card has been very suddenly reactivated, for a very soon departure date. After this, I will hold my head high, and do what needs to be done until Brad comes home.

I just want to scream!! We just got here, and they are taking him away. I know the president has a job to do, but it just makes me so angry and want to punch him in the face when he can go home to his family every night. Maybe he needs to come here and tell my 9 year old he has to say goodbye to his dad again, and then sit with him and reassure him everything will be okay every night for the next 15 months. Or answer my 3 year old when he asks when his dad is coming home from fighting the bad guys 75 times a day. Until then, his attempts to relate to the hardships we as military families face has no meaning to me.

I know Brad will be safe....it is just the leading up to, and the goodbyes that are one of the worst parts. After that we just do what needs to be done, and count down the days until we can be together again.